An IndieFlix Original Series


The First Chapters Of GROW OP Are Up And Ready to Eat:

What happens when the government grants a Tier-3 cannabis Grow License to an illicit marijuana dealer ... like Kevin? What happens when a guy like this suddenly become a 'legitimate' businessman? What will this process look like? Well, luckily for you, I am filming the whole thing and making it into a super awesome reality show.  This is that. You're Welcome.



  • ˚Filmmaker/Hobbyist
  • ˚Marijuana Afficianado
  • ˚High-Curious Bon Vivant

Some reddit trolls have been giving me shit - saying 'how you can have no job, no clue... and still pay for the production of a reality show?"

It's complicated - BUT - basically, it's because I was part of a class-action lawsuit against a hospital that was being run by monkeys on crack. In my case, a surgical team left rubber gloves inside my abdomen after fixing a perferated bowel.
I'm totally not the litigious type, but really who does that? Who leaves three gloves in a person. Not one glove. Three. Three Gloves. I don't understand. Is that like 2 people... one left both gloves and then someone else left one or was it like three people each leaving a glove in there - like they're making a point.
I really don't get it. Who does that?

Anyway - So I don't have to work, because some three-armed dipshit left his gloves in my belly.

Please stop asking me about this now, thank you.

And ENJOY Grow Op!



  • ˙PhDs Ethnobotony & Chemistry,
  • ˙Cannabis industry consultant,
  • ˙Cannabis culture and policy blogger,

Crispin and I share a mother. My dad owned exotic animals that he used to rent out to events and shows and stuff. His dad was the guy who calculated the trajectory of the lunar lander on Apollo 11, or something like that. Our mom was a really interesting woman.

Crispin is a genius and is really well thought of in cannabis circles. He suffers from severe social anxiety and has a bunch of nervous ticks and tweaks. This show was supposed to be about him. It isn't really anymore, because he's such a fucker, but he kinda still is in it, like whenever I can get footage of him. Not so much because he's like the weed celebrity in this show - which he is - but because I know it bothers him to no end... and that's funny to me.



  • Seattle's Greatest Weed Dealer,
  • Unsure of career choice,
  • Rapidly entering mid-life crisis,

Kevin is my pot dealer. He's the pot dealer to much of Seattle's coolest people (obviously). He just got a Grow licence in Washington State, and he's going to try to make a go of living the Legit Life.

"Grow Op" is a show about what that process will look like. We're going to be following him around while he does this:
Raises money, builds a grow house, markets his product... deals with the feds.... all of it.
Which should be pretty entertaining because he's kind of a crazy-ass summabitch.

Awesome idea, right? Yeah, I think so too... (it was my idea).


what happpens in this show:

You're just going to have to watch it like the rest of the human race. Get busy.


Other people who are in this show:

Yeah... so there are a lot of other people in this show. Here are a few of them.

Elspeth 01.png


This is the business manager that is in charge of the Grow Operation's development and management. She works for Jeffrey, "protecting the asset." She seems really nice, but I wouldn't be surprised if she's actually a total, raging shark. All I know is she's nice to me and doesn't mind the cameras.... Like... at all. She kinda LIKES them, I think. And the camera's don't seem to hate her either. [Token hotchick?] 

Jeffery in the growhouse.png


Yes, Jeffery.
And yes, she's a chick. She's the money behind the grow op that Kevin is starting.
Yeah, she kinda scares me, but in a good way. She's got like hundreds of millions of dollars and a brain that is like a giant, pulsing alien planet. I'd TOTALLY let her hold me and hug me and be my girlfriend and listen to everything she says...
... except she's not into dudes. Figures.
(Otherwise, I totally would have a shot with her. )


Matt Smith - Nuns - John Jeffcoat.jpg

Rev. Cockburn

Dude's name says it all. 
He and Crispin have some dealings going back a ways. They are like God and Satan, locked in an eternal battle for control of the forces of light and dark. No, seriously. I think this guy is Satan. Seriously.